Putting myself out there

Here goes my 'not first' post. 

Yes! I admit- I have made and deleted several blog pages before this thinking I am not good enough!

Imposter Syndrome or truth?! Guess only time will tell.

 

The reason I feel like things will be different this time is that I think I am different. The past year has taught me that life is too short to care too much about what people will think of me. (I know this definitely classifies as the 2 Cs- Cliché and Cringe!)

 

I will write because I want to. For myself and if people can relate then great. If not, that's okay too.

This is probably one of my biggest steps to testing how well I have learned to put myself first.

 

It’s the end of the year. I am choosing to spend time with myself. Never thought I would live to see the day when I make such a choice. Haha here we are though. I wonder if I will ever get over not feeling guilty for choosing me time. For not making everyone happy. For just being the person I am. 

 

Its slow but its consistent- the change in me. It’s funny how nobody tells you how ugly really taking a good look in the mirror feels like. We all want to be at peace and happy but have no idea how traumatising and painful the purging that occurs in the process of getting there is.

 

 

Since, I have an overactive and very dramatic personality (or so I am often told)! I spend a lot of time finding meaning in things that interest me. For instance-

Spirituality

Philosophy

The brain (More Academic!)

The Universe

Spock

Leonard McCoy

Master Yoda

The Jedi and the Sith

The light and the dark/ shadows

Hannibal Lector

Rock music

Mythology

Harry Potter

LOTR

 

the list could go on forever- considering the list grows daily... I guess I am easily impressed haha! I would mostly be rambling here about what my brain is ruminating on each week. So, if you would like to hang around, you are most welcome.

 

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