So I've been thinking...

 So I've been thinking.. as we do! 😛

Community is such a double edged sword. We all crave a sense of community but isn't it the same community the one that drives us to madness at times. How many times have we had to say what we didn't mean just to belong? Let go of things we really loved to do, for fear that people may judge/ talk?  Life is a tough gig as is, without the excess stress of risking being the misfit, right?

Makes me wonder though- is being a misfit really all that bad? I mean don't we all go through a phase where we feel like we don't belong? I sure did. To be honest- I still feel out of place on some days. But hey at least I have learned the value of my own company, being confident in the knowledge that it is better than the company of some members of the so called community.

Don't get me wrong, I have friends. Not too many, just enough. It amazes me that I catch so many of the people I know lying through their teeth so that they could conform to societal norms- hell I am not perfect, I feel pathetic when I catch myself bend my beliefs to agree with something just to not look like a freak in the crowd. Does this make us pitiful creatures striving to fit in or is it really the lack of the value of agreeing to disagree among people at large that is to blame?

Makes me wonder? What would happen if we didn't look like the ideal member of society and just got our freaks on? Would it be such a bad thing to be openly flawed in society? How many of us are probably lying to each other about the same thing to appear more normal- when in fact we could define our own normal if we mutually dropped the act. 

Over the years, I've stopped adjusting my preferences. Trying to prove myself to people around me. Stopped doing what would make me unhappy but please a (so called- as I now understand) friend. Hiding my quirks and flaws. Not going to lie, felt weird losing all the people that I did at first. It scared me a whole damn lot! Here's the thing though, once I got comfortable answering to the only person that is always with me (myself). My circle got smaller (*smaller than it used to be- LOL), but I find myself breathing easier, smiling more often, spending time doing what I love and being grateful for the absolute gems that I get to have as friends and family (yes, family members need to be filtered based on your boundaries too!) in my crazy but authentic life!


I am not saying that I am perfect. I understand that the need to belong is very natural to every human being. Till date I find myself saying things that I know I won't agree with just to fit in- every once in a while. But I am liberating my soul and spirit in baby steps. I haven't made it to my zen yet- but I also believe it is only a matter of time 😇 

I hope you can all give yourselves permission to be free. Find your vibe in circle of people you call your community. Life is awfully short to spend trying to fit in and far too special to let your dreams go unrealised. I hope you can find the courage to let go of everything and find your tribe that respects you and stays after all the rest have left. I hope you can find a place you can call your own, a place filled with people that truly see you! A place you find peace and rest...


I hope you are all well!

Take care and be kind!

Until next time x

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